Seriously?
I’m a fairly easy person to get along with. Pleasant. Professional. Respectful. I chew with my mouth closed. I make others feels appreciated. I know a lot of yellers who, unfairly or not, get shit done. I, on the other hand, am not a yeller – yet get shit done all the same. Despite the preponderance of successful assholes, I firmly believe you don’t need to be one in order to succeed. And yet, one of the things successful assholes have going is that people rarely fuck with them. Oh sure, they are resented, even hated, bad-mouthed for sure, but it’s rare that people attempt to cross them because they know that if they do, things are gonna get ugly and stay ugly for a long, loooong time. Not so with the nice guy. Nice guys have an affability that is often misconstrued as weakness, a seemingly inexhaustible patience, an apparent green light to take advantage. There’s the erroneous assumption that they won’t push back at all the tiny encroachments, the “Hey, I didn’t check with you first but figured you wouldn’t minds”, because they prefer to avoid confrontation. And, while that may be true, here’s the thing. It’s a preference. And there is a point, a critical mass, beyond which the nice, pleasant, professional, respectful, individual gets fed up and does become confrontational. And I’m not talking a “Let’s sit down and air our grievances” pseudo-therapy session. I’m talking the suffer-no-fools, brook-no-bullshit, take-no-prisoners confrontation that strips the paint off the walls and makes you wish for the existence of a time machine so that you can go back and kill Hitler, play the winning lottery numbers but, most importantly, reconsider ever pissing off Mr. Nice Guy.
I’m a big fan of Comixology, your one stop shop for over 7500 digital comics. I love their wide range of titles, their bundle sales, their storehouse of classic stories and single issues otherwise inaccessible to those of modest means. What I DON’T like about Comixology is the fact that you cannot download your purchases. You can view them online, but you can’t store them on your laptop to, say, watch on an internet-less flight. On the other hand…
I just downloaded a bunch of graphic novels from Rebellion in the U.K. and look forward to working my way through some classic Judge Dredd on the 5 hour flight to Toronto (then back to Vancouver, then back to Toronto again). Any of you fans? Have some particular storylines you’d like to recommend?
P.S. I really enjoyed the Judge Dredd movie. No, not the crap version starring Sylvester Stallone. I’m talking about Dredd, the version starring Karl Urban.
P.P.S. Why hasn’t anyone developed a Judge Dredd t.v. series? Hmmmmm.
I’m confused…are you mad at Comixology, or something else? The opening rant seems disproportionately strong for a mere grievance against a comic book site.
As far as comics go, I’m still catching up with Captain America and the Winter Soldier stories…such good stuff, especially Brubaker’s work.
das
Nope. Not mad at Comixology.
I think you just gave yourself a new series idea. And Karl Urban is no stranger to television.
By the way, I love the venting. It’s comforting to know that you might “go nuclear” on a deserving ass, because it means I’m not alone. Here’s to hoping your days get better and the idiot(s) get what they deserve.
Does this anger have anything to do with the email that got you mad in #Joepan? I hear ya about the nice guy thing. It happens all the time and makes me mad too. But you’re right about one thing you reach a point and look out…and what makes me laugh, everyone is shocked you exploded.
Hope all is well. How are the pups?
Hoping five minutes of confrontation with you has equivalent impact to five hours of confrontation with an ass but leads to efficient, effective resolution.
Ut oh. Someone is in deep shit. Since you used the f-word in your post, I feel it’s appropriate to use one here. 😉
Hope it all works out.
“Oh sure, they are resented, even hated, bad-mouthed for sure, but it’s rare that people attempt to cross them…”
Yeah but the party when they finally terminate are usually pretty good ones.
I had a good day at work today until the last 30 minutes. Let me give you a piece of advise. If you are complaining and yelling at a fellow employee and end the conversation with, “I know it’s not your fault”, understand that you have probably just been placed at the top of a crap list and personal attention is hereby cancelled.
I seem to recall you saying you can hold a grudge for a long time. But I hope things work out for you in whatever situation is currently getting to you. Be righteous but please don’t let it eat you up.
Joe, I hope you don’t get like I do when I’m truly upset, “I’m mad as hell and…” I’m crying. I can’t help it! I’m beyond pissed and my eyes swell up. And of course, I can’t think of a great comeback until 4 hours after the fact. Back in the day, my workplace held an assertive team building conference and for awhile I was a “don’t take no guff” but when I was economically downsized from my job 6 yrs ago all that went out the window. I was all, “I understand” and “It’s okay” and “don’t burn a bridge or rock the boat” but internally I was raging. Since then I have grown personally and professionally and am in a much better place. Chin up! You’re the better person!
Of course you could always go the way of Judge Dredd, slightly snear, state “you have been judged” and incinerate them. Though I think David Banner said it best, “don’t make me angry, you won’t like me when I’m angry”.
P.S. I loved Karl Urban as Judge Dredd. Great movie and a guilty pleasure – I watch it often.
@KathyC, I’m so desensitized that I didn’t even notice a “f-word” until you said something and I went back and reread the post.
@PBMom: great news!
I’m surprised anyone would take your pleasant manner for weakness. After all you’ve thrived in a world of egos, backstabbing politics, constant criticism, and cut-throat competition. How do people imagine that happens? Not by being a pushover, that’s for sure! And yes, those of us who’ve read your blog for a long time know about your grudge-holding capacity, which defies all Canadian stereotypes. So ‘they’ may have wrought more than they meant to this time, whoever they are.
Some Comixology titles you can download as a pdf but it seems like a limited range.
Dredd is a guilty pleasure – ridiculously OTT but actually quite entertaining. Oddly (to me), I developed quite an appreciation for Karl Urban after seeing him in the 2009 Star Trek movie. It didn’t do anything for my appreciation of Keith Urban, though.
Not only was it a serious rant that you started this entry with, it was one hell of a long paragraph. But in classic Dark Matter fashion, it leaves us guessing at the end.
I’ve always found that respecting others gives you respect back, except for the back stabbers out there. Eventually, karma will get them.
Re: Judge Dredd – anything pencilled by Brian Bolland. And if you’re willing to venture further into 2000 AD’s catalogue, then may I suggest ‘The Ballad of Halo Jones’.
I could have written this post word for word. I like to be nice to colleagues and I generally hate confrontation. But sometimes being nice means people will push you as far as they can to see what they can get from you. Just this week I decided I wasn’t going to put up with the little digs and have put one tricky customer in their place several times. I don’t get any satisfaction from being brusk, but they are beginning to realize that they can’t do and say as they please without consequences.
Great judge Dredd Stories from 2000AD Block Mania (#236-244). Judge Death (#149-151). Apocalypse War (#245–267 & 269–270). Also the Stories of PJ Maybe which appear in a number of episodes starting with #534. The Judge Rico stories which starts with #1186-1188 (thought my fav. stories are the Sector House ones that begin with #1215-1222). Hope that helps.
Maybe you need to spend less time hanging out with pugs and French bulldogs and more time with cats. Cats know how to get revenge while dogs just forget about it as soon as they see food.
I loved Judge Dredd as a kid and still dip into it every so often. The Day of Chaos storyline from a few years back is a masterpiece. There have been rumours that Karl Urban has been pushing for some sort of Dredd tv show on Amazon. Maybe you should get in contact with him 😉
First off, I’m sorry you’re having an issue with an ass. Couldn’t agree more with your nice guy attitude and limit. Had a similar situation once with trying to resolve a warranty issue for a big ticket item. Was stalled for MONTHS through nice phone call after nice phone call. Finally had to take the yelling, nay, screaming approach to the poor rep on the other end. Two days later, equipment arrived at my doorstep. Life’s too short to live like that, but very rarely, it just has to happen.
Hey, completely different subject: what are the odds you’ll be shooting in 4K/HDR for season 3? As I re-watch on Netflix, I’d really appreciate it!!!
You’re successful Joe. In the Scifi genre anyway. Besides Star Trek, what other Scifi series in recent memory has been close to Stargate in popularity and success? None. And you were involved in all three of them. So you’re that Successful nice guy, the polar opposite of the Successful assholes mentioned in your blog post!
I hear ya. It’s the life of the Mr. Nice Guy. You can have some consolation that those people are their own worst enemy, and ultimately their behaviour will come back to them. Just keep being you. I remember one time meeting someone for the first time and learning that they had heard of me before, through someone else that I didn’t know, who themselves had heard of me. They said that (apparently) I have a very good reputation in the area of being a honest, dependable and trustworthy person. I was very surprised (that anyone had “heard of me” anyway) and honoured.
Before it sounds like I’m blowing my own horn, my point is that by you just being you, the way people respect you can spread far beyond your circle of acquaintances. That goes for you and also for the yelling types, but in different ways of course. Again, it will come back to them.
I’ll have to check out the (newer) Judge Dredd movie!
I know what you mean, and have discovered that if you are quiet, efficient and get the job done they also think you are more likely to be a yes person and easily manipulated. But they couldn’t be more wrong!
PBMom: Yay! Sending prayers!!!
Karl Urban is always good.
I’d say you need a vacation but…. Sometimes silent and furious is more scary than all that yelling. My dad was a yeller and I learned to tune it out. Good luck Mr. M.!
Wow, top notch rant. So glad I am not of the receiving end, eek.
I tend to be mellow and nice until I explode like an egg in the microwave. Messy and loud.
Oh my… I do hope this issue with someone taking advantage of your good nature doesn’t have to do with the Dark Matter production, yet if it does… You have explained to us that there are many back office, upper management types in various production offices, in Canada, at SyFy, etc. I suspect one or more of these “suits” has finally crossed the proverbial line with you, to their great misfortune. Because you are certainly NOT weak, nor a person to be trifled with.
I also assume that many of these “suits” read this blog. Know this… loyalty and support here is for Joe. What ill befalls him either in aggravation, frustration, or betrayal will not sit easy with any of us here. Believe it.
Take good care Joe,
=^-^= =^-^=
Dredd was a favourite of mine in my comic book days.. The Dark Judges/Necropolis, The Day the Law Died, The Cursed Earth Saga stories were all great
The Dredd movie was fab, loved Karl Urban in it. A proper 18 certificate (or R rated for you I guess) movie capturing the violence and spirit of the comics.
Shame about the idiot you are dealing with, whoever it may be. Hope it can be sorted amicably, else with a devious and suitably dastardly plan….
@Joe I think it may be time to go the legal route.
I know you probably don’t think you have enough evidence to “win”
in court but check the email box we were communicating out of previously.
I’ve a legal solution that has worked for others in the past and could
work for you as well.
Sending hugs n love to You Akemi n The babes.
Hoping all goes well for Lulu on the 4th.
You are very much like me. At some point, I will blow up as well and God help anyone in the fallout. (My struggles with Patrick’s school situation to be a good example).
There was also a situation that I found out a few months after the fact of someone lying about me behind my back, a relationship I thought was severed on good terms. They used my good name to hurt and control other people (mind blowing the extent to which this occurred). I don’t care what people say about me — some people will like you and some will hate you and I’m okay with that — but that they used MY name to put blame to actions they themselves were doing and creating to hurt and control others — well, you know how that one is going to go — my personal mission to find true justice (even legally if necessary). That is narcissistic sociopath kind of stuff. There have been about 3 people in my entire life that have warranted that level of response. I feel badly for people still under the individual’s control. Actually I feel sad for them.
Anyway, I also respond like Maggie L80 with the tears. When I am so angry I can’t see straight, my emotional response is a mixture of intense anger and tears.
I hope whatever this situation is it can get resolved. You need to put your creative energies to your show and be there for your family.
How is Bubba doing? Been praying for him and Lulu for her upcoming surgery.
@pbmom Yay!
This is promising news. Hope the group home visit goes well.
Sending hugs love prayers and good thoughts all goes well for Patrick this next week as well. Hang in there! XO
And you as well Joe. Am rooting for ya! xo
My sister has a different approach. If I can’t get stuff done on the phone, and I often can’t, I bring her in. She does this thinly veiled fake nice voice. It’s a legit, effective strategy. They are terrified she’ll drop the act and they straighten right up. Her career’s been skyrocketing since she got involved in medical insurance case management.
Okay… I was afraid of that. Whoever has triggered this reaction…they do realize you’re Italian, right? Like…from the same Roman stock as the Caesars and the Borgias…?
They are sooooooo screwed. 😛
Whoopsies… forgot my infamous sig! I’ll have to post it twice now…
das
das
🙂
Just recently Karl said there was a movie in the works… then all word of it seemed to have disappeared. Got a friend who’s obsessed with the movie and a tv series with Urban would be awesome… hmmmmmmmmmm wonder who makes TV shows? Anyone?