July 1, 2012: Post-massage dog-wrangling! Days of Stargate: Atlantis Past! The Hive! Epiphany! - Joseph Mallozzi's Weblog

I’ve been feeling stressed-out of late and so, at Akemi’s behest, I booked us an hour-long couple massage at the local Absolute Spa.  We left the house well in advance of our 1:00 p.m. appointment yesterday, figuring we could relax in the sauna for half an hour beforehand.  We were only a couple of blocks from home when I happened to notice a dog wandering up the sidewalk, no collar or owner in sight.

I slowed down, expecting the owner to turn the corner and put my mind at ease, allowing me to be on my way.  No such luck.  The dog scampered one way, then the opposite direction, then stopped to sniff the bushes. I pulled over and looked on as the dog wandered about, ambled onto someone’s lawn and promptly relieved himself.  I watched and considered.  It clearly wasn’t a stray and had probably wandered off from someone’s back yard.  I could just leave him be and assume the owner would soon notice him missing and take up the search – or rely on some benevolent neighbor who wasn’t going to be late for their massage to take him in.  But I knew that even if a happy outcome was probable, I would regret not knowing for sure.   And so, dismissing any hope of that pre-massage sauna session, I made a u-turn, parked across the street, and got out of my car.

The dog, who looked like a cross between a pug and a beagle, eyed me suspiciously as I stepped out onto the sidewalk.  “Hey, boy,”I called, waving him over.  “C’mere.”  C’mere?  And then what?  Bundle him up in my arms and deposit him in my car?  Drop him off at my place and then decide what to do with him when I got back from my massage? Well, yes.  I figured I would put him in the kitchen where he could do the least damage and move my dogs to the living room.  And then I suppose I could call the City of Vancouver.  The local SPCA was also a possibility but I didn’t know if the shelter had a no-kill policy.  By giving him up to their care, would I possibly be complicit in his death? I didn’t like that prospect and decided right then and there that I would leave my name and number and, if he didn’t find a good home, that I would adopt him.

But I had to get him in the car first.  I opened the back door wide and called him over, motioning him inside.  Hey, check it out.  Free ride!

The dog wasn’t having any of it.  He reared up, barked, and paced around nervously.  “I have some treats!”offered Akemi who had followed me out of the car.  She pulled out her treats, little bacon-flavored ginger-bread-man-shaped cookies she keeps in an Altoids tin, and tossed one over.  He cautiously approached and snapped it up. She tossed over another.  He wasted no time snapping up that one as well.

I took a handful of treats and began to lay a path, from Akemi to inside my car.  The dog sniffed the first treat and downed it.  Then another. We were on our way!  Everything was going according to plan when some guy came barreling around the corner and startled the dog.

By calling its name, Rufus, and then stopping to throw me a “What the hell?” look.  There I stood, in my leather trench coat, treats in hand, alongside a winding trail of tiny bacon-flavored cookie men leading straight into my getaway car, the very image of a heartless dog-napper.

“Oh,”said the guy.

“Oh,”I said back.

An awkward silence during which dog Rufus finished off the trail of treats and parked himself at my feet, casting a longing gaze from the bacon-scented back seat of my car and back to me.  The look on his face seemed to say: “Well?  Are we doing this?”

“I thought he was lost,”I explained, “and when I didn’t see anyone around – ”

“Right,”said the owner, nodding to curtail further discussion.  “Well – ”

“So – ”

“Thanks for taking care of my dog.”

“Sure,”I said.  “No problem.”

I considered informing him that ole Rufus had taken a huge dump on his neighbor’s yard that he might want to consider cleaning up, but he and Rufus were already on their way and, besides, I had a massage to get to.

Anyway, things ended happily enough.  Rufus returned home safe and sound and, more importantly, I was able to enjoy a guilt-free massage.

Oh, and the spa ended up letting us use the sauna after our session.

To be honest, I don’t even like saunas.

Continuing our trip down Atlantis memory lane…

THE HIVE (211)

A powerful pay-off to the intriguing Lost Boys, The Hive is Atlantis at its best – with plenty of twists and turns, great character moments, and spectacular visual effects.  And, as an added bonus, we develop another aspect of wraith mythology with the wraith worshipers, humans who serve and revere the life-sucking aliens.  More is made of the divisions inherent within the enemy, something Sheppard exploits at episode’s end to save a human civilization from a mass culling.

David Hewlett, as always, is firing on all cylinders, this time delivering a performance that shows a side of Rodney we’ve never seen before – intense, overwhelmed, physically and mentally tortured.  As for Ford, he goes out in a blaze of glory, redeeming himself by distracting the enemy so that his friends can make good their escape.  Or does he? Sheppard thinks it very likely that their resilient comrade found a way off the hive ship before it was destroyed.  I’d like to think so too, that Ford is still out there, harvesting wraith and fighting the good fight. But the fact that we don’t see the character again after this episode would suggest otherwise.  Still, as we always say whenever someone gets killed off: “This is science fiction.  Anything is possible!”.

EPIPHANY (212)

Oof.  This episode was the equivalent to season one’s Sanctuary – slowly, somewhat silly, and, occasionally, downright painful to sit through.  A great door in (the time distortion portal) is undone by a story involving a community of space-hippies who are being stalked by an invisible bogeyman (the stand-in for the creature during production was a guy in a pink monster suit that would have us in stitches whenever he appeared on dailies).  Sheppard joins the commune and he is revealed as…The One who will lead them.  As prophecized, of course.  It turns out the monster is actually a manifestation of their own fear and, to defeat it, they must come together as one – just like the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers did in in the movie in order to revive their boss, the giant head.  The power of love inner strength vanquishes the monster and the episode ends with a good ole fashioned mass ascension.

Oh, yeah.  Like I started to say in last night’s entry.  The results are in on Gateworld’s Atlantis Season One Awards!  The fan awards covered categories in best individual character moments, best team moment, best alien race, best individual villain, coolest ancient technology, coolest alien technology, best guest star, and best episode.  Found it odd that Rising I and II weren’t in the best episode category (which, I believe, they would have won handily).  Anyway, you can check out all the results here: Atlantis Season One Awards: Results!